Lives are Numbered, Seasons have Days

I've been meaning to do this write-up for quite some time already but it just came to sink-in, now. 

I started drafting this post about 2 months ago with 2 paragraphs and 4 lines on it.

Until today. I decided I had to finally put things into words, this time. This deserves a publish. 

I'm breaking the news.

I'm finally in a relationship. 

"ENOUGH," I said midway through the year of 2019. I grew tired of dating gazillion times, sipping up coffee while mustering a conversation which was a struggle to maintain. My life seemed to be stage play in barren field with all the entertainment I've been through that bore no fruit at all.

I think, for most of my age, people have at least planned to find partners and settle. On the other hand,  I had my own directions , even considering ending up alone to the point of buying myself a small house where I will live by myself til I grow old.

Life always has ways of making us tread into crossroads that lead us elsewhere.  I couldn't imagine how I managed to end up with this person (not that it's bad thing, though). It's just that  I've always been told I was difficult to please.

For most of my friends, I was dubbed as someone with a very high standard but I couldn't help but be defensive because I just knew that there  just has to be standards.

Even so, I always knew I had the most stubborn emotions that would not easily fall for a one time big time gentleman's gesture. I guess all the dating that never spurred out into worthwhile relationships, built me quite tough to delineate boundaries.

I realized today that we don't always get the things that we want because sometimes what we want isn't the best for us. I like him because he was a a really decent man. This led me to giving him and I a chance, a chance I did not regret.

It's been about three months now and we've been learning more of each other. The younger me was yet so rigid,  everytime I saw something unpleasant about a guy,  2 month was long enough to waste.

But here I am today, getting over the 2 month spell ,anticipating for our 4th on the 9th next week. This was quite a marathon an achievement of forebearance.  

Maybe meeting the right person also gives us opportunities to get to know ourselves better.

I found out that my tough side was all the wall I built.  And when I had it down, I was more at arm's reach for the people that were around me. I discovered I was a tough woman who cries over an emotional movie scene. I'd cry when I get overwhelmed,  too.  A lot of things have changed.  

Before I decided to get into the relationship, I went through 40 days of reflection with my Purpose Driven Life devotion. The 40th day was our last day in Singapore and was the day when I said yes to the commitment. The merlion was our sole witness.  😁

In my 40 day journey, I was forced to fast communications with him because there was barely any signal at home.

And even when we were in Singapore, we were 15 minutes apart, too, as I chose to stay with my cousins and he, alone in the BNB in Chinatown. I was mostly accompanied by my cousins while we were together (haha strict) but I guess, it was just the way it was supposed to be. We came home to he PH together,later, still apart.

In a span of months, we had our first few arguments, we've had deep talks, we've had video games and mostly food. He'd come over town and visit home frequently and get our time together. There was, indeed,  a huge adjustment with that kind of set up.

We've recently had our first valentines too. Things, indeed, have drastically changed.

A few days ago , it was my turn to visit him. I spent my weekend in Manila, and met his friends who were warm and fun, too. 

Having to spend more time with him in Manila made me discover new parts of him. How he was with friends, how he is in his house and a whole other side of him I never got to see when we spend time together at home.  

I admired him more when I had to observe him preach to kids in Kid's Church, that, on top of cleaning his whole condo for my arrival that he was 30 mins late for my arrival in the airport because fell asleep from being tired. I was sooooo infruriated when I arrived but I reserved the anger for an explanation.  

Most of all, I knew he had a sense of respect and value for me when he had to leave his condo late at night to sleep at a friend's house only to come back early in the morning to get have the rest of the day together. And on a Monday he first took half of his day off to bring me to the airport and have a quick lunch together before heading to work. I find it very incredible. 

At this point, I could say, my heart has never been so at ease and settled.

I can really just look back to the days of heartaches and deliberate search. I must say, that our lives have numbers that continue to go on as long as we live and in this life, we have seasons and the seasons certainly have days. We count them everyday.  

To all the the ladies that feel that they are running out of time for their life goals: "A delay is not a rejection but an easement for us to be well equipped while we get to our destination"

Run the pace of time.

My prayers of well being to you reading this. ♥

God be praised.

SHA