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SEASONS OF TRUST AND FAITH

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Imahe
  I have always lived my life in constant trial & error. I was always in for the hide and seek, eventually earlier in 2019 I decided to let go of things and explore some more. It turned out that as stable as people saw me then, I deliberately decided to hop off from it and take on the road less comforting, less travelled and more risky. Then it began; I made massive decisions that also created great changes in my life. I decided to quit my job which paid me very well, decided to induce my self to pressure in deciding to get into law school with a meager amount of finance which now I am not sure would suffice me to get through the year. However, in my current position, I have to say I’d never have my life any other way.   As I reflect, I realized I am right where I am supposed to be. In my vision, nothing is clear, everything is zero visibility but what excites me in this season is that I am in the right position to trust everything to God, to trust Him that He wi
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WIRED TO BE BEAUTIFULLY LOVED

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Imahe
My dad had been a lot different lately. I guess this pandemic's lockdown has its way of squeezing out creative juices and hidden abilities in people. I have been with my dad for 26 years but it took us that long to know him a little bit more. He loves planting and finds joy in taking care of them. This week, he showed me a little Bonsai plant he was taking care of; I never knew he would take his planting hobby to that level! I observed tie wires entangled with the plant's stems. I asked him why he had to wire them up. He said, the wires were meant to form the plants according to his design, eventually they will be removed once the green stem turns brown and hardens up. In that moment,  I saw God in my dad. Many years ago, God made a covenant to David saying " I will be his Father, and he will be My son. And My loving devotion will never depart from him as I removed it from your predecessor." (1 Chronicles 17:13) God is no different than our earthly
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DON'T WAIT FOR AN I'M SORRY

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Imahe
"The earlier you admit to your mistakes  the more time you would have to learn and grow from them.-Edmond Mbiaka" Do you wait for an " I'm Sorry !" before you forgive someone who has wronged you?  Does it make you feel bad and hurt right in the kokoro (japanese for heart) when someone fails to say sorry after they've hurt you?  I'm not quite sure about this, but I think most of us are so hard-wired about the concept of the word "sorry" as a requirement for forgiveness.  Today, I came to think that there are people who wants forgiveness because something they've done wrong and intends to never do it again but couldn't actually say sorry. So, I made a quick inquiry into this modern premise.  etymonline.com says that the word " sorry " originally came from the following words:  Sarig (old english)- distressed, grieved, full of sorrow Sairiga (Proto Germanic/Old German)- full of sore Sa
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UNBROKEN VOWS

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Imahe
30 BETTER DAYS DAY 11: INNER VOWS & RENOUNCEMENT  Are there parts of your life you have not yet surrendered to the Lord?  INNER VOWS Inner vows are personal declarations we make for ourselves as a result of feeling hurt or oppressed. They are rooted from a bitter cause are technically designed to protect our feelings from repeating pain. For example, when we say, "I'm never going to allow that to happen to me," "I will never be that kind of person" "I will never allow anyone to hurt me ever again." "I wont be that kind of a parent" "i will be better than that." you will be able to notice it because it is an aftermath of anger, resentment, rebellion, distress instead of inspiration and we often confuse it to be declarations of prosperity. Friends, there is a difference. It's easy to distinguish an inner vow. You have to see where this vow is coming from: is it from a resentful circumstance or from a spiritual insp
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TO THE MAN GOD HAS PREPARED FOR ME

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Imahe
We've always prayed for the man of our dreams but have we trusted the Lord enough that He is going to give it to us? Me? It is a definite yes and there is no better way of claiming it than living in the present that he is somewhere out there just praying for me, too. That we'd finally meet someday. It had been said that when you pray, pray as though you have received it already. MARK 11:24  "Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours." So here  I am writing to him.  ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ To the man God has prepared for me... Hello! How had quarantine been? Has the boredom gotten you already? Coz it totally had me.  Guess what? today is the 10th day since I started a program for myself called " 30 Better Days ." I started counting since April 29, when I was on my lowest. Y
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30 BETTER DAYS

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JOHN 10:10 The thief only comes to KILL, STEAL and DESTROY:  I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full What a month April has been! I just ceLIBERATED my 26th Birthday last April 27. I haven't returned in a while since that period of silence.  Yeah, I guess that's just how we work to maneuver around difficult situations.  So yeah, after almost a month, I am SINGLE again--that's why I called it ceLIBERATION. I guess that's just how it's meant to be for now. It is hard and painful because we think we've done everything we could to make things work, but it just didn't. Simply that. We might have never ending questions about ourselves, or our capabilities in terms of relationships but we cannot discount what we have done to make everything better.  We can neither blame ourselves nor our partners why things didn't workout. It could be a mere misunderstanding that could never be settled over a phone call or an elec
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Asking for Cool Off

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Imahe
I've only been in a real relationship for quite some time and dealing with another person at close proximity (at least)  socially, has always been a challenge to me plainly because I easily lose patience and I'm not well acquainted with negativity. Today, I count our 5th month into the relationship with my boyfriend.  I am in and I have been more than surprised by everything thats been happening in a short span of time.   It seems that there was no honeymoon stage for us as we went straight to the "real deal",  especially with our long distance set up.   These days,  we got to know things about each other more. We recently had a lingering problem.. OUR COMMUNICATION.   From the beginning ,my boyfriend and I were both aware that our LDR set up was up to a great challenge because of the distance; he is in Manila and I,  in Butuan. This was quite a petty issue since we eventually found a solution for it.  We planned visits back and forth each other. 
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Lives are Numbered, Seasons have Days

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I've been meaning to do this write-up for quite some time already but it just came to sink-in, now.  I started drafting this post about 2 months ago with 2 paragraphs and 4 lines on it. Until today. I decided I had to finally put things into words, this time. This deserves a publish.  I'm breaking the news. I'm finally in a relationship.  "ENOUGH," I said midway through the year of 2019. I grew tired of dating gazillion times, sipping up coffee while mustering a conversation which was a struggle to maintain. My life seemed to be stage play in barren field with all the entertainment I've been through that bore no fruit at all. I think, for most of my age, people have at least planned to find partners and settle. On the other hand,  I had my own directions , even considering ending up alone to the point of buying myself a small house where I will live by myself til I grow old. Life always has ways of making us tread into crossroads that le
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